AHHH! WTF happened?! Apparently 50 freaker Kobe points happened!
I HATE KOBE!
It all began 12 years ago when, the out casted middle child, Desi declared she liked rookie #3 in a gold jersey that read LAKERS! Completely unfathomable in a strictly JAZZ household! 3 years later she wore the horrid inscriptive jersey!
Soon after and every other year or so since then the Jazz can't seem to surpass the Lakers in the Western Conference Playoffs! Tonight is neither an exception to this as we are now on the brink of elimination by one game. But true to my Jazz roots, I foresee a game 7!
Completely disgusted by a horrific game 4 defeat, I needed to let the steam out. Rain prevented a run, so I opted for the next best thing...Maverik Run! Nothing like Maverik entertainment for the eyes. Seriously, every time I park some redneck stereotype is being fulfilled via this country stop! I ALWAYS laugh at it, twitter it, and then feel much better about my life. Tonight's scenario was no exception as I saw a 62 oz. refill being chugged by a burly woman in a pink housecoat! Laugh, twitter, purple skittles, it's all good.
Just then a Bronco pulled up with the back side/windows cut out. Yes! Double dose! Twitter pic! Until the unthinkable happened, a swarm of Laker fans in the form of punk stoners jumped out! They saw the purple and blue logo with the #8 upon my shirt and started railing on me. The trash talk began as I was pumping gas, all the while still conversing on the phone with a "mister guy". I tried to control my temper by rolling my eyes and shooting crusties at the haters. But when one yelled, "WILLIAMS IS A PU**Y!" My jaw and phone dropped as the rage came out of my middle fingers! "BITE ME LAKER BOYS!!!" and "D-WILL KICKS YOUR ASS!!!!" was all I could muster as I sped away!
My ferocious screaming with the pedal to the metal soon came to a halt once the flashing lights were spotted in the rear view! Followed by more ferocious screaming! Anyone who really knows me can attest I shriek, I am a screechier! Whether it be out of frustration or excitement, it all sounds about the same but was exempt from the following officer-driver conversation.
Officer: What seems to be the problem Miss Adison?
Jazz fan: Besides the Jazz offense tonight?
Officer: Ha ha
Followed by his 5 minute diagnosis of the current Jazz 3-1 situation
Officer: Do you know how fast you were going?
Jazz fan: Fast enough to get away from being harassed at Maverik.
Officer: What?
Jazz fan: I was getting gas when these boys pulled up and started yelling at me. They started taunting me, saying explicits and all! I thought they were going to follow me so I sped away.
Officer: Give me a description of the boys. Do you remember what they were driving?
Jazz fan: They are driving half of an OJ Bronco. They were teenagers, wearing...uh white...and yellow...and had hats.
Officer: I'm going to go check this out, do you want to file a report?
Jazz fan: No, I'm okay now.
Officer: Well get home, safely and SLOWLY.
Jazz fan: K thanks! See ya at church tomorrow!
Haha suck it Laker Boys! It's the playoffs, no mercy! And that's the 4th time I have been pulled over this year. Luckily ALL warnings! Cause you're so pretty! I know right!
"HELLOOOOOO!!! BREEEE!! BREEEE!!" came from the floor mats.
WHAT THE??? OMG! I pick up my phone and realize "mister guy" is STILL on the screen/phone!!!!!
One last frustrated screech for the night....call end.
AHHHH! WHY?! Now he thinks I am completely psychotic!!!! All because of this guy...
I cannot recall any of his stats or "stellar" accomplishments, but I can recount this fact...HE'S A TOOL! He CHEATS in basketball and CHEATS on his wife. Oh and he took Brandy to prom.
